Just for fun...

[ChezCheese:)]

I look at that rider and I think, "Your poor spine and joints!" Ain't worth the rest of your life in a wheelchair maybe. But I am old. And wise

 

[ChezCheese:)]

Here's an idea for a new career for some of you old guys:

 

[ChezCheese:)]

Back during the days of the Soviet Union, it took 10 years to get a car after you paid for one. Once, a young guy went to the car dealership to order a car. He paid the money, and the asked when can he come and get the car. "It will be here, waiting for you, exactly 10 years from today". The man signed the papers, started walking away and then stopped, turned and asked the salesman: "Wait, will it be ready in the morning or in the afternoon".

"What difference does it make?", asked the salesman.

"Well", answered the man, "the plumber is coming in the morning".

 

[ChezCheese:)]

(Found this one while deleting old emails:
-- a special for Stefan!)

A Polish immigrant went to the DMV to apply for a driver's license.

First, of course, he had to take an eye sight test

The optician showed him a card with the letters 'C Z W I X N O S T A C Z.'

"Can you read this?" the optician asked.

"Read it?", the Polish guy replied, "I know the guy!"

 

[Chargeride]

 

[JGcycle]

My feelings on snow;

 

[Chargeride]

Give snow

 

[Chargeride]

Ive had this bad boy in the loft for 40 years, got it out to see if it works, theres a few issues and then I found out this diy kit model was Joy Divisions first synth, a
Powertran Transcendent 2000.
Then I remembered the lad I bought it off was from Manchester.
So Im going to tell everyone its theirs till proven otherwise

 

[Stefan Mikes]

Get up and work out, you lazy crowd!
I have just completed my morning workout, and thanks to a smartwatch I got from Santa, I can now clearly see what muscle groups worked the most!

(Translated from Czech).

 

[ChezCheese:)]

 

[Chargeride]

I do like randomly pronouncing words as they are written, whats strange is it quickly catches on with friends and family and they start mimicing me.

I started saying hill.i.arious for a few months in reaction to funny events and the stepdaughter still says it years later on.

 

[Stefan Mikes]

@Chargeride: Is it OK to pronounce "t" in the middle of the word, or should I absolutely replace it with a glottal stop?
That is, can I say "Atlantic" or it has to be "A'lan'ic"?

 

[kevinmccune]

@Chargeride: Is it OK to pronounce "t" in the middle of the word, or should I absolutely replace it with a glottal stop?
That is, can I say "Atlantic" or it has to be "A'lan'ic"?

we are lazy( one way slang and dialect develop)

 

[ChezCheese:)]

You can say it either way. Or both!

 

[Chargeride]

@Chargeride: Is it OK to pronounce "t" in the middle of the word, or should I absolutely replace it with a glottal stop?
That is, can I say "Atlantic" or it has to be "A'lan'ic"?

I say atlantic probably cause its a rare word that isnt used a lot in fast slang, and I dont have a strong regional accent, plus Im more aware of it and probably telling a story at the time.

Saying at-lann-tic is something a quizz master would say in a pub.

I had a girlfriend who couldnt pronounce 'ugly', no matter how hard she tried it always came out as 'ugerly'.

The infamous Majorca advert

 

[Jeremy McCreary]

@Chargeride: Is it OK to pronounce "t" in the middle of the word, or should I absolutely replace it with a glottal stop?
That is, can I say "Atlantic" or it has to be "A'lan'ic"?

I've noticed a related treatment of the internal "t" in American English just in the last decade or so, mostly from younger speakers. By example, the internal "t" in "important" is dropped to yield "impor□ant", where the "□" is some kind of stop or tiny pause. Not exactly the glottal stop in Hawaiian.

Never heard this done before then, and I've lived in regions all over the US.

The infamous Majorca advert

Ah, so that's where it comes from! Horrifying to think that our beautiful American English might have been contaminated by the Brits.
;^}

 

[Chargeride]

Thats a working class London accent she developed and the lad uses a posh 'sloane ranger' accent of its time.
Princess Diana was the most famous sloane ranger, though she dropped the twang to be very softy royal posh.

Sloane Ranger - Wikipedia

en.m.wikipedia.org

 

[Stefan Mikes]

I always thought the □ in some British accents such as Cockney, like in bo□ o□ wo□a was exactly the glottal stop. I know nothing of Hawaiian but Danish is another European language with a pronounced glottal stop. A Dane speaks like he or she were suffocating!

 

[Chargeride]

The boxes are confusing me

 

[Stefan Mikes]

The boxes are confusing me

These represent a silent letter