Recent content by Horace71

It's so flat in N. Dakota you can watch your dog run away for two days!

The little fox is smart enough to cross under the road, not over it. Northern Colorado on a perfect 72 degree morning.

A man died and went to heaven. He asked God why he died so young. God said, "You're 82! Three score and 10 was allotted, four score for the strong." The guy asked, "What about Willie Nelson, or Keith Richards?" God says "I don't know...they were here when I got here!"

Velotric is a real bike. Fairly new (about a year). I have 2 and could not be more pleased with them.

For a long time I thought it went something like this: " Our Father, Howard in heaven, how'd you know my name?"

Turns out that when asked who your favorite child is, you're supposed to pick one of your own. I know that now.

The old and the new! A 2022 bike and a 1924? Model T pickup.

Swing hard...in case you hit it!

If people don't occasionally walk away from you shaking their heads, you're doing something wrong!

Overheard two ladies at the next table discussing their sex lives. One says hers has been okay since her husband started taking viagra. The other one asked if he could get it over the counter. The first on says..."If he takes two he can!"

Wanted: Someone to brush my teeth with. 9 out of 10 Dentists say brushing alone will not prevent cavities. No weirdos.

I have a daughter going to school to be a PA. Sent her this to study.

A buddy told me his ex wife meets with the devil himself weekly on how to be even more evil. He's not sure how much she is charging him!

The Super Bowl is all about the food and the commercials. Nobody cares how many baskets they score!